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Thursday, December 11, 2008

Jennister Aniston,nude on the cover of GQ...but why Jen?

Jen, Jen, Jen. Whose idea was this? We know it could not possibly have been yours, it was your publicist.

Fire her because, Sorry Jen, the cover smacks of desperation and we don't understand why. In a sense we understand why you think you should do it but actually doing it?

We get it. Your husband left for some gorgeous creature from another galaxy and the husband lacks a sensitivity chip.

We understand you want to show the world that you still got it, smoking body and all middle aged folk all have to draw the line somewhere.

The Vogue cover was good but naked GQ too? You said Vogue misrepresented you and then you did it again?

The only more cringeworthy act you could possibly pull now is to go to Vietnam, Ethiopia, adopt a child, and name them Pax, Zahara and whatever.

We agreed with you that Angelina was uncool and inappropriate even when we did not understand why you were talking about it 3 years and six children later.

We can only imagine Brangelina snickering at this point and Jen honey, Sweetie, please don't even mention their kids names in an interview. Sigh! Tut, tut, tut.

According to GQ:

As we finish lunch, she talks about the project she seems most excited about: a movie she’s developing called Pumas, in which she hopes to star with Elizabeth Banks. “It’s sort of a female Wedding Crashers,” she says. “It’s these two girls who are aspiring cougars. It is so a comment on the sexual double standard—and what’s been ironic is how hard it’s been to get this movie made. Studios want it, but they’re afraid of Middle America. They’d want to change it; they’re saying, Oh, you can’t do that, people just can’t imagine you…” She’s alluding here to Hollywood’s formula for romantic comedies and her default character within them—offbeat, likable, and unlucky in love…before I leave, I have to ask about what she—referring earlier to the photo of her and the half-naked dudes—described as “sort of a cougar thing.” Her friend Courteney Cox has just announced a TV show called Cougar Town, there’s that Pumas movie, and of course, the younger man. Sure, it all seems a little heavy-handed, but if Jen’s trying to signal that in the next episode of her life she’ll play a fortysomething sex symbol, well, we’re certainly not going to complain.

No, Jen, no! Angelina did the ridiculous "WANTED" then redeemed herself with "Changeling" and now you are going in the exact opposite direction? Don't, just don't play a cougar-ever! Don't even ask why. All you have to ask is What would Demi do? or what would Halle do? or better still What would Mariah do?

Somehow we don't see them playing cougar roles in movies beacause if acting is fantasy, they are living that fantasy in real life and so are you.

She also says:
“I still can’t wrap my head around how old I’m going to be,” she says. “I feel more comfortable today than I ever did in my twenties or early thirties. I’m healthier. I’m more at peace in my mind and with my body.”

So, Jen, as a friend (well, in our dreams) we would like you to give yourself a good head shake and truly be at peace with your mind and body. Ignore those people because when their potential 10 children watch the movie where their parents (according to Angelina) fell in love, all the children will say is "Mommy, why was Daddy trying to kill you?" or vice versa.

Your'e rich, mega rich, thin, very thin, tanned and Oprah likes you. What more could you ask for?.
Anyway, we expect Angelina to counter all this publicity you are getting by announcing that she is adopting nine more children and pregnant with quadruplets.

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